5 months old

Time is flying. This will be the last monthly post I write while on maternity leave, as I return to work on Monday. I know it’s time to get back to the real world, but it’s going to be hard to leave my boys again, after getting used to spending every day with them. At least I won’t have to send them to daycare just yet, as D will be taking the next 4 weeks off to stay home with them.

Here’s what’s going on with Mr. E at five months…

Adjusted age: two months.

Stats: 10 lbs 13 oz and 21.5 inches long.

Milestones: Smiling and cooing! The best. He is such a happy little guy and quite talkative too. I’m really looking forward to those first laughs next.

Sleeping: Dare I say it? I think we may have gotten a good sleeper this time. Or at least compared to Theo. He wakes up one or two times per night, but lately it’s usually just one time. And he slept completely through the night twice! Of course, T was only up 2-3 times per night until he hit the four-month sleep regression, and then he was up practically hourly until he was about nine months old. So I don’t fully trust E’s sleep habits just yet. Naps are pretty inconsistent — sometimes he’ll sleep almost all day and just wake up to eat. Other days he barely sleeps at all. I had hoped to be on a little more of a schedule by the time I went back to work. I guess D will have to figure it out himself.

Eating: This continues to be the area where we struggle most, but has finally turned a corner and we’re doing more nursing than bottles. We’re down to about 3-4 bottles per day (3 oz each) and nursing the rest. Nursing is going better, most of the time, though there are some frustrating days where I can’t seem to get him composed or focused enough to stay latched. When we’re home alone we can usually work through it with a little patience, and I have the option to go make a bottle if he gets too frustrated. But when we’re out in public it’s harder to get him focused. He doesn’t always like the nursing cover, especially when he’s  frustrated, and his frequent unlatching and flailing make it impossible to nurse discreetly sans cover without flashing everyone around me. But if I give a bottle, I have to pump to make up that feed to keep my supply up — which is even more inconvenient in public. When I go back to work I’ll obviously need to pump while I’m away from him, but my ultimate goal is to only pump when we’re apart, and always nurse when we’re home together. I think we’re getting closer.

Personality: So sweet and happy. Even on his fussy days, “fussy” is about as escalated as he gets. He rarely even full-on cries. And now that he’s smiling and cooing, his happy personality is showing through even more.

Likes: Bath time! I’ve started putting the boys in the tub together (well, I put E’s baby tub in the big tub) and they both just love it. E kicks and talks to big brother, who loves to help me wash him. He also loves having his diaper changed. T was like that too. We called it his “reset button.” If he was fussy and we changed him he’d suddenly get so focused on what we were doing that soon he was smiling and talking and forgot why he was upset. So far E is the same.

Dislikes: Still reflux. We’ve got the head of his bed elevated, we keep him upright after feeds and he’s on Prevacid, but he’s still so grunty and arches his back in pain often. I’m really hoping he grows out of it soon.

Mama: Still shedding like crazy, though it seems like it may finally be slowing. I’m surprised I have any hair left. I’m chopping my hair tomorrow and am hoping that makes everything more manageable.

I’m feeling kind of sad about my maternity leave coming to an end, since this is the last time we’re doing this, and I wish I had done more with the time I had. I had visions of taking the boys on frequent outings, having dinner made every night, and doing all the things around the house I never have time for when I’m working. Instead, there were more days than I’d care to admit where I managed to squander my entire morning juggling the very different needs of an infant and a three year-old, and by the time I finally cleaned up the breakfast dishes and reheated my coffee for the eighth time, it was time to start lunch, followed by nap and then we were stuck at home until T woke up, and then it was time to start dinner. Entire days simultaneously dragged on and passed in the blink of an eye. Yesterday, my last day of maternity leave, I felt like I managed to do things “right” – I took the boys to the zoo, took Theo out to ice cream, and then nursed Emmett in the park while Theo played. It was a day full of the things I imaged maternity leave would be… of course, I skipped my shower and we missed Theo’s nap, so something had to give! But it truly was a great day, and I ended my leave on a high note.

Onto month six…(!)

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T loves his brother so.

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Tummy time.

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Shots!!

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Lazy morning snuggles.

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Cousins!

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He loves his birdies.

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More snuggles.

Bath time!

Party at 3 a.m.!

Zoo day.

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4 months old

I had drafted the following post weeks ago – on his actual 4 month birthday- but never got around to finishing it until now. You could say life has been a little busy. 

I can’t even describe how good it feels to be writing this update from home. I know I keep saying this, but the NICU really does feel worlds away, and life at home is pretty normal for a newborn, if he were an actual newborn, that is. I go back and forth on how detailed I get on the “how old is he” questions when out in public. I’ve never been more aware of just how often this question gets asked! I’ve kind of fallen into a habit of quickly triaging the situation: what’s the likelihood I’ll see or interact with the person again? If slim, I just tell them his adjusted age. If I’m likely to see them again or we have friends in common, I say he’s four months old but was born three months early, so he’s more like a one month-old. Of course, this usually prompts a million questions. Some days I feel like a bit of a freak show with all the questions and shocked expressions. Other days I don’t mind telling the story. And some days I even feel downright proud. Why yes, he is a miracle! Yes, I am superwoman!

With that, here’s what our little miracle is up to at four months…

Adjusted age: One month.

Stats: 8 lbs 13 oz and 20 inches long.

Milestones: E lifts his head up and shows pretty good neck control for the most part — though he will occasionally slam his face into us or throw his head back while we’re holding him, usually when we least expect it. I’m terrified he’s going to backflip out of our arms.

Sleeping: He wakes pretty consistently every three hours to eat but has given us a few four-hour stretches. We’re still dealing with some reflux, which prevents him from falling back asleep sometimes, and for about a week there he was regularly awake and fussing between 3 and 6 a.m. Just in time for Theo to wake for the day. We have learned keeping him upright or inclined for a bit after eating helps some, so we’ve fallen into a routine where D will give him a bottle at night while I pump, and then since he usually finishes before I’m done, he’ll prop him up on a pillow in front of me while I finish pumping. By the time I’m done and have rinsed out all my parts, he’s usually sound asleep and his tummy has settled enough for us to put him down. During the day he mostly naps in his swing, which is inclined. We borrowed a Rock n Play from some friends, thinking he might like to sleep in that at night, but for some reason he hates it. He’s back on Prevacid, which seems to help some.

Eating: We’re still struggling a bit here. After the pediatrician had us increase the number of fortified bottles from four to six, we were given permission to drop down to five after he had some better gains. So I’m getting to breastfeed two to three times per day and then pumping and bottle feeding for the rest. It’s pretty time consuming. He still isn’t a great nurser and with us having to give so many bottles doesn’t give us much opportunity to practice. I’ve seen a lactation consultant and have started attending a weekly breastfeeding group where I can weigh him before and after nursing so I can see how much he’s getting. He is slowly getting better. It’s really an uphill battle, though, and I’ve been tempted to throw in the towel on nursing on numerous occasions.

Personality: He is still very snuggly. He’s also starting to show a bit more of his spunky side. When he’s hungry, he doesn’t usually cry; he yells! He really sounds quite demanding. I’m looking forward to seeing his personality develop more as he gets older.

Likes: Snuggles with mom, the sound of big brother’s voice.

Dislikes: Reflux and gas. This baby is like a whoopie cushion with the impressive amount of gas he can produce. It’s not just a little toot; it just keeeeeps going. I swear he farts out twice his body volume. No wonder he gets so agitated.

Mama: I’m feeling pretty good, though I’m still shedding hair like crazy, which is really annoying. My hair is longer than it’s been in a while but it’s permanently in a top knot so I don’t have to deal with pulling hair off my clothes all day. Washing my hair is frightening and I’m always surprised I have anything left by the time I’m done. The weight is still falling off, thanks to breastfeeding. Other than that, I’m beyond tired, but not feeling too overwhelmed.

I’ll wrap this with a few photos from the past month and will feebly vow to be more timely with his five-month update. How do I almost have a five month-old?!

Squishy snuggles.

Brother helper.

So tired.

NICU day 92 and 3 months old

I had really hoped we’d be out of the NICU by the time his three-month birthday came. But here we are. Actually, we had a really interesting conversation with Dr. L today at rounds. He asked us if we were tired of being here (duh) and said while they don’t like to do this, if we were interested, we could learn how to insert a feeding tube and we could go home on the NG tube while we continued to work on feeding.

I was shocked. He was basically putting the decision in our hands when to go home. I feel really conflicted. I want him home so bad. But I want him home healthy. And bringing him home on a feeding tube would mean multiple follow-ups with specialists, possible g-tube surgery, and the intimidating chore of changing his tube ourselves (which comes with the risk of accidentally inserting it into his lungs instead of his stomach – yikes.) It would be one thing if we were facing a long-term feeding issue. But all the doctors and nurses say this is textbook for an early preemie and that he’ll grow out of it. He just needs time. I just wish I knew how much time we were looking at. Another week, two weeks? Let’s wait it out and bring him home wireless. Another month, two months? Let’s just get him home already and stop wasting time in the hospital. So after talking it over with D and the rest of the medical team, I think we have a plan: give him until 42 weeks gestation (he’ll be 40 weeks on Monday) to lose the tube. His team thinks he’ll probably figure it out before then anyway, but if not, we’ll bring him home with a feeding tube at 42 weeks. If nothing else, it’s nice to have a hard stop.

Feeds went okay today. He’s taken more feeds by gavage than usual (three today, compared to his usual one a day), but the feeds he has done have been nearly full volume. It seems whether he takes a half feed every time or a full feed every other time, he’s still stuck at around 50-60 percent of his volume orally right now.

Anyway, with that daily update done, here’s what’s going on at three months…

Adjusted age: 39 weeks 3 days

Stats: 7 lbs 10 oz and 18.9 inches.

Milestones: As of August 1st we are off oxygen! Starting to do tummy time a few times per day.

Sleeping: Still sleeps pretty well, but I think that has more to do with him spending all his energy trying to eat. Though I still have hope we got a good sleeper this time since Theo was horrible!

Eating: The bane of my existence and obsession of every waking moment? In other words, we’re working on it. 65 ml of breastmilk plus 24 kcal of Neosure to fortify my milk, every three hours. Combination of breastfeeding and bottle feeding pumped milk (about 50/50 currently).

Personality: Is it too soon to say he is an affectionate baby? Theo was always so busy and not much of a snuggler. Even when he was an infant he was constantly moving and trying to see everything. E seems much more content to snuggle up against me. Part of that could be his prematurity. We’ll see…

Likes: Snuggling, being held. When he cries he calms down instantly when you pick him up.

Dislikes: Gas, reflux, having his temperature taken and his NG tube. Tries to pull it out often and hates having it put back in.

Mama: Still hating pumping. Still going into the office twice a week. It’s been hard to plan for things, knowing I’ll be out soon, but not knowing exactly when that will be. Starting to drop a bit below my pre-pregnancy weight, which is nice. I lost quite a bit of weight while breastfeeding T, but then gained it back, and then some, after I weaned. I’ll have to be more aware of that this time around. I’ve started losing my hair lately — I had completely forgotten about that fun postpartum side effect. When you’re pregnant you often stop losing hair (which is why pregnant women usually have great hair), but then a couple months postpartum you lose all that hair you should have been gradually losing during pregnancy. The human body is weird. Yesterday during barre I kept having that sensation that a hair was tickling my arms and I must have pulled about 10 strands of hairs off myself throughout an hour long class. At this rate I’m expecting to be completely bald in a few weeks.


NICU day 79

Today I had to go into the office, and D wasn’t able to be at the hospital either, so E spent most of the day alone. I got here around 7 this evening and checked in with the nurse to get a report on his day. One big brady/desat (reset that clock by 5 days again), and about 50 percent of his feeds by bottle (not too shabby). Unfortunately when I nursed him tonight he only took in 6 ml, which is just 10 percent. It’s frustrating, to say the least. On the plus side, he’s up to 6 lbs 12 oz.

He was pretty grunty this evening. He’s kind of a grunty baby in general, thanks to the reflux, but tonight he seemed especially uncomfortable. When I picked him up, he would calm down, but as soon as I’d set him down, he’d start up again. He really likes to be held. I can’t wait until he’s wireless and I can walk around or go find a comfortable spot to sit and cuddle him. Because he’s tethered to all the monitors, I can’t take him very far, which means I usually just stand next to his bassinet to hold him.

That’s about it for today. Onto day 80…

NICU day 66

Last night I spent the night at the hospital. Like the night before when D had stayed, Emmett had a pretty long night of just general fussiness. The good news is, he’s having way fewer events than he has lately. But that reflux is just brutal. He spent pretty much the entire night grunting, punctuated by the occasional crying spells. So I didn’t sleep well and was up a lot. It was kind of like … having a newborn.

This morning, after a quick attempt at breastfeeding (still not really getting it), I left the hospital to meet D at the pool for Theo’s swim lessons. Since I was running late, I decided to pump on the way, something I’ve done many times. I’ve mastered the art of pumping and driving. I have a hands-free setup, so I simply get everything situated before I start the car, and then unhook once I get to my destination. I usually wrap a cardigan around myself so it’s not so obvious to the cars next to me. Well, I may have been driving a little fast, trying to make it to the pool on time (I bet you can guess where this is going). Yeah. I got pulled over. While pumping.

I had a moment of panic when I saw the lights. Although a cardigan is sufficient cover from drivers in the lane next to me who probably aren’t looking too hard into my windows, the thin, semi-sheer fabric didn’t exactly hide the outline of my pumping shields. Or the noise of the pump, for that matter. So much awkward. Thankfully, I think it was even more awkward for the police officer, who quickly let me off with a warning. I think he wanted to get out of there even faster than I did.

I had a good day with Theo, watching him swim, and then meeting up with some friends with kids his age for lunch and play time. Then I had to rush back to the hospital (once again pumping in the car, but this time paying close attention to the speed limit!), so I could meet the doctor for E’s frenectomy (tongue tie clip). I was nervous about the procedure, but it ended up being very quick and he hardly cried at all. The eye exams were 100 times worse. They immediately put him on me afterward to nurse — both for comfort and because they want him extending his tongue as much as he can right away. It went a little better than this morning’s session. He’s still kind of a lazy nurser (which will hopefully improve with practice and maturity), but I could already tell his latch was improved, so I’m hoping we continue to make forward progress.

He’s still hanging out on the oxygen tank at 1/32 liter and hardly having any events (knock on all the wood). He got a bath this evening — first time in the sink — and did pretty well. Weight was up 58 grams, bringing him to 5 lbs 15 oz. He very well may crack 6 lbs tomorrow!


NICU day 61 and 2 months old

Today Emmett is two months old. And we’ve been here 61 days now. With any luck we’re about 2/3 of the way through this NICU journey.

I went into the office today so D was here most of the day. He seems to be doing better with his breathing and reflux, though they were having to chase his oxygen levels all over the place today. He’d desat and they’d turn his O2 up — and then he’d high-sat and they’d turn it down. They’re still having to suction him a fair amount, but he sounds better than he did the other day.

This evening I hurried back to the hospital after dinner so I could get here for his 8:30 cares and give breastfeeding another shot. I’m happy to say we had, by far, the most successful session to date. More about that below.

So here’s what’s going on at two months…

Adjusted age: 35 weeks

Stats: 5 lbs 5 oz and 17.5 inches. Like last month, I created the image below before they did his evening weigh-in. I figured like last month he’d maybe be an ounce or so off but wasn’t expecting him to put on a whopping 110 grams tonight!

Milestones: Getting moved to an open crib, stepping down to low-flow nasal cannula at 1 liter, beginning to breastfeed.

Sleeping: So far so good, but as I mentioned last month, at this gestation most preemies sleep pretty well. Within the next few weeks he should start showing his true colors.

Eating: 45 ML of breastmilk every three hours via NG tube, plus 26kcal of fortification added to my milk.  We got to try breastfeeding for the first time last week, and as of tonight I think it’s finally starting to click with him. I think it was a combination of him feeling better, simply getting bigger and more mature, and I think a lot of it was that I was more comfortable. For the past several days the lactation nurses had been telling me to hold him a particular way (“cross body” hold, with my hand holding his head), and I had been following their direction, even though it felt unnatural to hold him this way (I had always preferred to nurse Theo in a “cradle” hold, with his head in the crook of my arm). But since I had never fed a preemie before, I followed their direction. Tonight I did what felt natural to me, and was far more successful. Moral of the story? Listen to your instincts, mamas.

He still isn’t able to get much, but he was rooting around, opening his mouth and truly giving it his best effort. And several times he would latch and actually get in several good sucks before losing his “grip.” He probably would have done even better, but he got a vicious bout of the hiccups about halfway through and I could tell that just wiped all his energy. It was just such a relief to see him actually doing what he should, though, even if he needs more practice. I think the most discouraging part about the past few days is that he just didn’t seem to know what he was supposed to do. We’ll probably try weighted feeds tomorrow (where they weigh him immediately before and after to see how much he got), now that he seems to be actually getting a little. As he gets more and more by breast, they’ll start subtracting that amount from his tube feedings.

Personality: Like last month’s update, it’s still pretty early to see much personality shine through, but he’s certainly gotten more vocal about when he’s unhappy with something lately! Whether it’s reflux or those horrible eye exams he isn’t shy about speaking his mind.

Likes: Being held. His oxygen and heart rate are always at their best when one of us is holding him.

Dislikes: Reflux and eye exams. And boogers.

Mama: is down to pre-pregnancy weight but feeling pretty squishy still. I went to barre for the first time postpartum last week and am hoping to start making that a regular habit again.

I’m back at work now so that I can save the rest of my leave for when E comes home. It’s actually been kind of nice to be back. I only go into the office twice a week (usually Mondays and Fridays) and I work from the hospital Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday. I’m thankful to have such an understanding employer, and this schedule allows me to have two “consecutive” days in the office (Friday and Monday), but still lets me get 2-3 days of hospital time in between so I don’t feel like I’m missing E too much. I also have most of my standing in-person meetings on Mondays and Fridays, and all the others I can easily call into. I’ve discovered the kids’ play room on our floor is quiet, has a desk, and is rarely used (the only kids allowed in the NICU anyway are siblings and they’re probably spending most of their time in their brother/sister’s room), so it’s perfect for taking calls.

I’m still obsessive about pumping (even though I despise it), but I’ve been able to stretch it out to every three hours during the day and and 4-6 hours at night, while still increasing supply. Currently getting about 33-35 oz per day, which is way more than he’s eating right now and we’re running out of freezer space in both the kitchen and the garage freezer!

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Birth, one month, two months.

Birth, one month, two months.

NICU day 60

I didn’t get to spend a lot of time with E today — D spent the night last night and we had two birthday parties to take T to today. After getting home from the second birthday party, I rushed to the hospital just in time for his 5:30 cares. He was very alert so we decided to try breastfeeding again. It went better than yesterday and he latched a few times, but he still isn’t really getting it, which is discouraging. The nurse thinks it’s fine, considering how eventful the past few days have been for him, but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t worried that he might not ever get the hang of it. It’s a very common preemie problem.

The good news is, the nurse said he had a pretty good day today, and he had a really great evening with me too. His breathing sounds clear and he doesn’t seem quite as bothered by the reflux as he had been. The nurse still had to suction him earlier this afternoon, but I have hope things are starting to look up. Weight dropped 12 grams, but that’s not surprising, with him on the diuretic. Still holding steady at 5 lbs 1 oz.

NICU day 59

This morning the doctor prescribed Emmett a prednisone nasal drop to help with the inflammation. He’ll take it twice a day for 7 days. They also put him on a fast-acting diuretic for two days, twice a day to help with lung inflammation and edema. If we don’t see improvement, may look into a longer-term diuretic.

After a rough night last night, I was both looking forward to getting away from the hospital, and dreading leaving Emmett at the same time. The fact that Theo has swimming lessons on Saturday was a good excuse to get away. Sometimes I need that extra nudge to peel myself away. While I was gone, his breathing got so bad again that the nurse decided to suction him even though we’ve been trying not to as much because of the inflammation. It’s a good thing she did, because she got what she described as a “gremlin” from his nose that had formed a complete plug. No wonder he couldn’t breathe. She said she was so impressed with the size that she called the doctor in to take a look!

Unfortunately, both his cannula and the feeding tube may be exacerbating his congestion. The feeding tube is giving all that refluxed milk something to cling to, and the cannula is blowing dry air in, which is basically the perfect recipe for monster boogers that are so far back in his nasal/throat area that they’re really difficult to suction out. We have some humidity on the cannula, but it’s still drier than if he were just breathing room air. The feeding tube also keeps his esophageal sphincter slightly open, which can exacerbate the reflux. Unfortunately, life is basically one giant catch-22 right now. We can’t remove the cannula until he’s having fewer events, and we can’t remove the feeding tube until he gets the hang of breast/bottle feeding. But the reflux and difficulty breathing are inhibiting feeding and causing events. And around we go.

We may try another round of systemic prednisolone, since he responded so well last time. If we do, they may try removing his cannula toward the end of the course while it’s still in his system. Meanwhile all we can do is try to keep breastfeeding him whenever he’s alert and hungry, but he’s working so hard to breathe right now that the nurse described it as like you or I trying to do aerobics and eat at the same time. Our attempt at breastfeedng today was a complete bust, so after about 20 minutes I just pulled him up into a kangaroo hold. Despite my disappointment over continued breastfeeding failures, he ended up having a really good rest of the afternoon. He was calmer than I’d seen him in a couple days while on my chest, and hardly had any desats. Those steroid drops really made a huge difference with his congestion, and while he’s still bothered by the reflux, at least he’s breathing clearly now. His weight was up 24 grams tonight, bringing him to 5 lbs 1 oz.

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NICU day 58

I had the below post all written out last night, and then things took a turn for the dramatic. It was by far the worst night I’ve had with him yet. The reflux has been getting worse and worse, and he’s had so much suctioning to remove everything that keeps accumulating in his nose, that he’s now developed some irritation in his nose from all the suctioning. His nasal passages got so swollen last night that he could not breathe out of them at all. Babies are obligate nasal breathers, so it’s not like when an adult is stuffed up and just breathes out of their mouth instead. So he would turn purple holding his breath, then gasp and cry out (which thankfully would get some oxygen in him), but then he’d repeat all over again. I felt so helpless. All I could do was stand there holding him upright, sobbing, while listening to him gasp for air. This all went on until about 2 a.m., when the doctor gave him some steroid drops in his nose to calm the inflammation. That at least allowed him to get some air through, but he’s still really struggling to breathe and just sounds so miserable.

Anyway, here’s the rest of what I had originally written yesterday. I don’t have the energy to merge the two or rewrite anything.

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This morning Emmett’s team started him on Prevacid [edit: I had originally written Prilosec – oops, wrong med!] to help him with the reflux. It will take a few days to see whether it makes a difference. I’m really hoping it does, as it’s pretty miserable seeing him so miserable. This evening his nurse mentioned we would take him off of it if it didn’t seem to be making a difference, “because of the potential side effects.” When I asked her what the side effects were, she kind of stumbled and admitted she didn’t, know and then said I could just google it. Um. Not impressed with this nurse so far. What medical professional tells you to google? Of course google came up with all kinds of awful stuff. I’ve been so good about not consulting Dr. Google when it comes to Emmett, which is very unlike me, so I’m kind of annoyed she sent me in that direction. A few minutes later the nurse came back and said she talked to the doctor and he said the side effects are so rare that they aren’t even worth mentioning unless something seems off with him or he stops growing. Reflux is really common in preemies — and even in term babies — and the treatment with antacids is pretty common.

Speaking of growth, he had a wimpy 2 gram gain tonight, but they’re actually happy with a modest gain, as he’s been a little puffy the last couple days and they think he may be retaining water. He’s had several days of large gains, which would corroborate the edema. The nurse earlier today was even talking about starting him on a diuretic to flush him out. I need to talk to the doctor more about this, as the nurses have been fairly vague and I hope it’s not indicative of something potentially more serious.

Theo came to visit his little brother this evening. I had gone into the office today and after work I got him from daycare and we swung by the hospital for a few minutes. He hadn’t seen him since he got out of the isolette and immediately asked where the top of his bed was. He was happy to see that baby Emmett was bigger, and when I picked him up and crouched down low to the ground so T could get a better look, unprompted, he kissed the top of E’s head. I wish I had gotten a photo, but my arms were full of baby. It was a very sweet moment.

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NICU day 57

Today was kind of a rough day. Emmett’s reflux is getting pretty bad. He isn’t spitting up much, but it is backing all the way up into his nose, which creates massive boogers, which causes him to have trouble breathing, which causes him to desat. He’s also clearly in a lot of pain over it, and he grunts and cries a lot. Because of all the desatting, there was some talk about putting him back on caffeine, or possibly increasing his oxygen support again, but after talking with the doctor, he said it’s not really a lung issue; it’s just the reflux. The caffeine would likely make it worse, and the extra oxygen support wouldn’t even really do much good. We may start him on antacids though.

Breastfeeding was a little discouraging today. He was pretty sleepy and didn’t latch as much as he did yesterday, and having him laying sideways made his reflux worse, so after a few minutes we gave up and I held him upright, but shortly after that he needed his nose suctioned because he was having difficulty breathing. It’s just been a draining day. I know the reflux isn’t anything terribly serious; it’s more uncomfortable for him than anything. But it’s just so draining.

On a positive note, weight was up another 62 grams. He is now 5 lbs!

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